This morning I was starting to put together my latest newsletter (you can subscribe here), and I was going to use the words above as my lead in as it’s an expression that I have been using for a great many years. Then I thought about it and decided that I would write a blog post with those words as the title.
As it turns out, as an old fart, both of these songs are quite familiar to me, and both have developed a large following, being considered as either a protest or an type of anthem by those at the time.
For myself, I feel that both could be entirely applicable to events of the current times.
That being said, these songs were not what generated the thought process for this blog post.
Rather, it was a bit of contemplation of recent personal happenings.
Top of mind, yesterday, along with several Kiwanis colleagues, I attended a memorial service for a friend and long time club member. Ed Bean was a member of the Kiwanis Club of South Edmonton for sixty-five years, caring deeply about anything which would benefit young people. More than that, he was a pillar of the Edmonton community. He helped create and maintain Crystal Kids, an organization teaching, mentoring and nurturing at-risk, inner city kids, named after Crystal Glass, a company he formed in 1949. He was involved, over the years, in a great many community positive happenings as well as being a member of the Edmonton Investors Group which owned the Edmonton Oilers of the National Hockey League from 1998 to 2008. A true people person, Ed will be sorely missed, however his heritage will live long.
I recently set up and started a private family Facebook group, designed to introduce and acquaint diverse family members with each other. Like many families, as time has passed many of us are not familiar with distant cousins, and even may not actually know that we have these cousins. (And no, I’m not providing a link for this blog post, that’s what private is all about.)
As I’m working on this group, I have been delving more and more into our family history. It keeps getting more interesting, and, perhaps unsurprisingly, the odd time someone shows up that I knew about, but didn’t know we were related. I do imagine there are many families which may be like that. Check into yours, never know what you’ll find.
Another thing going on, there is a chance that I may actually have my hip replacement surgery on the horizon. As a result, I’m once again going through a battery of tests, procedures and activities in preparation. Perhaps this time it will actually happen. Fingers crossed.
There are a few other things going on that I won’t bore you with. Be it known however, that snow, ice and cold weather are still “in vogue” here in Edmonton and as such the trike and SLK are still ensconced in the garage. (Now I’m making a sad face.)
Bottom line… life is proceeding in it’s unique fashion and our job is to do our best to adapt to it’s flow. It seems to last longer that way.
Now, to some who know me, that would be considered a dangerous thing.
Perhaps not, today anyway. However it has been an interesting thing for me. A bit interesting that is. You see, it’s a holiday Monday, here in Alberta it’s called Family Day.
One might imagine that due to the day, I would be thinking about family, and I did a little, however my main thinking has been about my retirement, and some of the factors which have been affecting it.
It is no surprise that topping the list has been COVID. I use capital letters here because that was the way it arrived. Now it has become more like #@&%*$ Covid.
For millions of people, the ramifications of Covid threw the proverbial monkey wrench into the system. My thinking today is more limited to retired folks, because I are one.
Back in late 2018 I retired for the final time, and yes, I even had plans. More than just plans, they were being put into practice.
For a good portion of the winter I would be in Malaysia, based at our apartment, spending time with family, friends and just doing some traveling around. My wife Kim would join me for part of the time as she was still working. The late spring, summer and early autumn would involve quite a bit of time on my motorcycle, going on rides with mates and fellow veterans, or just by myself touring around Alberta. On the weekends my wife and I would relax and travel around a bit, as well as being involved in weekend motorcycle and other community events.
For 2019 most went according to plan. I spent three months in Malaysia, Kim with me for a month. Summer saw some 6000 kilometres put on the bike and we were involved in various activities most every weekend. Right up to the end of the year we took part in both Kiwanis and veterans events. Life was doing okay.
2020 started out quite well, however there seemed to be ominous rumblings. Mid February Kim and I were off to Malaysia for six weeks. For the first three weeks we were joined by our daughter and her husband from Edmonton. For me this was a big event as she would meet her two sisters in Malaysia, in person for the very first time. (If you have been following my blog posts over the years you’ll know we have a blended family.)
After we arrived, the ominous rumblings increased, and people started talking about this Covid thing. The first three weeks went well, daughter and her husband headed home, and the rumblings increased. After another week they were more than rumblings and we reluctantly made the decision to err on the side of caution and headed back to Edmonton ten days earlier than planned.
Turns out, it was a good decision, as air traffic was essentially shut down shortly after we got home. We had to do our two week quarantine and then Kim was laid off as her workplace was shut down (only for about three months it turned out).
I’m sure that everyone is pretty familiar with what followed for the remainder of 2020 and basically all of 2021, so I’ll just talk about how this affected the retirement thing.
Now is a good time to touch on another factor affecting retirement, that being my health. I have always had a pretty robust immune system, however I have had some mobility issues, particularly in the last ten years. I was diagnosed with a bad hip and the decision was made to put me on the list for a total hip replacement. For those who have experienced this, it is an interesting process. Immediately I was scheduled for a whole battery of tests, including, but not limited to x-rays, heart tests, lung tests, dental tests, nervous systems tests, and more. These are all intended to determine if I was suitable for surgery.
All the tests were completed, however our friend Covid had laid a beating on all scheduled surgeries. Then, towards the end of 2021, I was notified to expect surgery in January 2022. About the same time I received a small injury to my lower leg and it was slow healing, which they thought likely due to me being diabetic. Injury, small or not, has a risk of infection, hence the surgery was cancelled.
Turned out that over the years I have developed poor circulation in my lower legs, causing my legs to be discoloured, and have extremally thin skin, which can be easily abrased, and any wounds would be very slow healing. Following that determination, there came extensive treatment by the wound clinic and home health care (kudos and thanks to these awesome medical professionals). End result, I will now be wearing compression stockings for the remainder of my time.
Good news is, the surgeon seems happy with my condition now and I may be looking at surgery in April of this year. After still more tests of course.
Now, back to this retirement thing.
Of course, any social activity had become a non-starter during 2020, so it was just me, or Kim and I, for the majority of the time. With my hip issues, I made the change from two wheels to three and bought a trike to ride. This made Kim happy and she now rode with me quite a bit. Between the two bikes I managed to put on over 8000 kilometres in 2020. As well the weather was helpful as Kim and I had our last ride of the year the first week of December. Throughout the year our riding was mostly solo. On the odd occasion we rode with others, whenever stopped we would be outside and maintain the suggested two metre distance.
For 2021, social activity remained at a minimum. Kim would go to work and get groceries, being masked and maintaining her distance at all times. Basically I would just stay home, so much that even Otis the cat was getting tired of me. Between the weather, a blown radiator and my leg issues, less than 4000 kilometres was accomplished on the bike. Veterans gatherings were almost nonexistent, while Kiwanis took on an extremely low profile.
2022 was more of the same, however we were starting to get out for our weekly dim sum, socially distanced of course. For me, I think Otis was starting to maybe like having me around, or not. He’s a cat so go figure. Very little riding this year, only about 4000 kilometres again. For my legs they were doing regular appointments as well as home care, so I had to be cautious and was not able to plan much. Come summer our veterans group was having weekly gatherings once more, however they were socially distanced in a parking lot. Oh well, at least we were getting together. Then in the fall, we were able to get together, actually inside. With some of our members being immune compromised, they were not comfortable attending. For Kiwanis, meetings were by Zoom only.
In September, we were lucky enough to add a vehicle to our garage. Defined as a Classic is our 1999 Mercedes SLK 230 sports car. For the next couple of months it was able to steal a few thousand kilometres from the trike, however they seem to get along well anyway. The nice thing is that it expands our ability to have some fun travel, day runs on the trike and longer with the Merc.
So now, here we are in 2023.
Soon it will be three years since we have seen our daughters and grandchildren in Malaysia. Otis and I have held down the home front with me getting out of the house for a few hours averaging one day a week. On occasion maybe two. Right now, this is retirement for me… my house. What day of the week is it? Oh it must be the weekend because Kim is home on Saturday and half of Sunday, and sometimes on a holiday (she works most holidays).
But, things are looking up. As I mentioned, possible surgery in April. Late last year I had a coffee with a friend, then with another friend in January, and now one tomorrow, this with a regular coffee mate from before Covid, but now for the first time in about two years or so. The two “summer rides” are resting in the garage, awaiting Spring and the opportunity to get out and about. An increased level of activity with Kiwanis is being contemplated. Our veterans group is getting together more often. And… we hope to be back in Malaysia about a year from now.
So… the retirement thing, what’s it all about. My experiences have been up and down, back and forth, good and bad. Well, that’s what life is, not only for me, but for every person experiencing the retirement thing. We are all different, not better or worse. All unique!
I’ve thrown a bit of light on my retirement thing, how is yours going?
Want to share? Please do! It would be great to hear from you.
Nine years ago this week, Kim and I left Malaysia after a six-week visit. It had been my first time to Malaysia, and it was a most wonderful experience.
Not only did I get to see, for the first time, the country and city where my wife had been born and grew up, I got to meet, in person for the first time, the two daughters from her side of our blended family and our grandchildren. That was so special to me.
Since then, I have been back to Malaysia four more times, in 2015, 2017, 2019 and 2020. Kim and I went for four weeks in 2015, in 2017 we flew over together with Kim staying four weeks and me for eleven. In 2019 I was back in Malaysia for eight weeks by myself. Kim and I traveled for six weeks in 2020 and were joined by daughter Anita and her husband Aaron for the first three weeks, allowing her to meet her sisters in person for the first time.
And then came Covid-19. And it came fast. We actually had to cut our visit short by ten days so that we could get home. Then we had to isolate for two weeks and then Kim got laid off. But that’s a story for another time.
It is now closing in on three years since we’ve been to Malaysia. And we really have no idea of when we’ll be there again. No idea of when we’ll see our daughters and grandchildren in person once more.
Now I started this blog post more than two weeks ago and walked away, leaving it uncompleted. Following that it just sat when my brain kinda went blah. Until today.
To be honest, I have been feeling great frustration within myself. I have things to do, why am I not doing them! I created this “Wee Internet Empire” thing so that I could keep myself involved in something. So what if few people seem to pay much attention.
In reality it’s more than that.
Yes, I want to be in Malaysia, see our daughters and grandkids, but even more I want Kim to get to be with them. She worries so much about them as they have struggled through Covid (most of them actually caught it at one time or another) and the economic turmoil the pandemic caused throughout Malaysia.
And still more than that.
Pre-Covid I had been placed on the list to have a complete hip replacement. As the medical system was stretched so thin during the pandemic it took quite a while to work my way through all the required tests and procedures to be ready for my surgery to be scheduled. At the end of 2021 it was. However, just prior I had developed a bit of an issue on my lower leg and the surgery was cancelled until it could be dealt with. Long story short, ten months later we are still dealing with it. Once dealt with, I’ll have to begin redoing some of the tests and procedures to prepare for surgery as they must be done within a certain time period pre-surgery.
Don’t get me wrong, all is not doom and gloom.
We have been out on the motorcycle over the summer (limited a bit by my leg condition) and have enjoyed traveling around in the Mercedes convertible. We often enjoy our regular dim sum and get together with fellow veterans on occasion. We see our daughter and husband here in Edmonton, my sister from Calgary, while our son from England and his wife came for a lovely visit.
I guess it kind of boils down to the lingering cloud of uncertainty. It seems to fluctuate between shades lighter and darker grey, never becoming black however white remains elusive.
We are trying to make some decisions. Do we hold off on traveling until all is complete, leg issues and surgery. Or do we call our travel lady and book a trip. Certainly something we are trying to work out.
Our future path remains to be seen. I am hoping though, that by sharing these thoughts with you, my readers, it will help me get back on track doing some of the other things which I should be working on.
Thanks so much for reading. Your feedback is always welcome, as is your support.
For our family, the Lunar New Year is celebrated with Chinese traditions. We are a blended family. My wife is Chinese from Malaysia, on her side of the blend we have two daughters, with their children, who live in Malaysia. On my side of the blend we have a daughter with her husband in Canada and a son with his wife in England.
Due to the fact that Chinese New Year is an important event to our family, I have chosen to do this blog post in both Chinese and English. I use Google Translate which does a most excellent (although not perfect) job.
For the coming year, on behalf of myself and my family, I sent along wishes for good health, happiness and success, to all. May we live together, sharing this earth, in peace, harmony and understanding.
As I spoke about in my podcast earlier this evening (link here), our second home is in Melaka, Malaysia. I am retired and my wife is close to retirement, but still, since 2015 we have been spending part of each winter there, except for the last two years (thanks to Covid). With children and grandchildren in Malaysia, it is a natural place for us to go, not to mention all our friends, and oh yes, the food. This photo is a selfie of me standing on our balcony in 2020. Behind you can see the small farm I talked about and in the distance are the buildings of downtown Melaka.
Recently, Melaka, along with much of Malaysia, has been receiving a great deal of rain, very much more than they have seen for many years, particularly when one considers that January is typically one of the driest months of the year, whereas November can be one of the wettest.
What I have done here is to provide you with a number of photos taken around Melaka and posted on the Melaka Facebook Page, so that you can see the impact that the flooding has had.
While many in Canada or the US would typically experience vicious storm conditions associated with flooding, that is not always the case here. The flooding comes from a large amount of rain, causing the rivers to overflow their banks. As well, Melaka is a coastal community, hence ocean tides can have an impact also. The lunar new year is approaching, and generally this is the time of the year’s highest tides.
Regardless of whether the water comes from a storm surge or constantly rising levels, it manages to do a considerable amount of damage and create many issues. The photos in the gallery below will certainly give you an idea of that.
I know a number of the areas shown very well, and am hopeful that our family and friends will not be greatly affected.
With Covid still playing it’s games, we have no idea when we will be able to return to our second home, however we have been assured by our daughter that all is well there up to this point.
Thanks for reading this blog post. I do appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, so please do share them. I also invite you to visit my web page and check out some to the other sites that I share.
Aging is an interesting process, and of course there is only one thing that can stop it, seeing as how nobody has discovered the Fountain of Youth, or if they have, they are certainly not sharing that information.
As I am continuing to age, I have become increasingly interested in knowing more about my family history. To this end I have been doing research using a number of genealogy and family history archive sites and have constructed a family tree using Ancestry, having been a member since 2014.
For me, delving into family history runs in spurts, at times on the front burner with the heat on high, and other times on the back burner with the heat turned off. One thing though, it’s always on a burner somewhere, not put away in storage and forgotten.
Yet, with all this interest in family history, I have had very little contact with my cousins or their families, either in real life or social media (which is only a shadow of real life). Not for any specific reason, just that life happens and we were all on different roads.
Recently however, my sister forwarded an email to my brother and I from our oldest cousin, that he had just become a grandfather. As I am a grandfather of seven, this struck a note with me, and I sent him an email of congratulations, along with a little blurb of happenings with me. In return he sent along a recent family update that he produces each year, and a blurb of happenings with him.
A few days later I received an email from another of my cousins. It seems that my email had been forwarded to all the cousins. Lo and behold, this particular cousin also had an interest in family history and soon we were exchanging information and we look forward to further collaboration.
Not long after that I heard from yet another cousin and we corresponded as well.
As I continue to age, I have been the family patriarch for a number of years, and am known by some family members as the Old Guy In Edmonton, or by some folks simply as the Old Fart (which is okay).
That being said however, I am excited and very happy to be connecting with my cousins and their families, yes, their families as well. I am reasonably active on social media and, since sending congratulations to my cousin, I am now connected with not only him, but a couple of his siblings, and several of their children. It is so interesting learning things about all of them, and sharing things from Kim and I as well as our children and grandchildren.
Maybe that is all part of what aging is about. Life, learning and family. Certainly much better than some of the other things we have to deal with in our daily lives.
Thoughts about family are important, because family is important.
In this world we are all different, and it would be most interesting to hear your thoughts about family.
Richard's Ramblings 